Motherhood can be a 7-letter word ... A.N.X.I.E.T.Y.

It's about 12:40 a.m. and I can't sleep. And I just need to write this out and vent ... Honestly, having a good night's rest has become a seldom occurrence the past several months. Of course, it's a given with an infant in my home, I'm not complaining, I've been blessed on how such a great baby he has been -- no colic, not whiny, good sleeper (unless he's feeling sick),  but tonight I know I am up because of my anxiety. I've had my...

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Welcome to the Planet ... Welcome to Existence ... (Ayden's Great Escape from the Womb)!

After 9 months and 2 weeks my life was changed within minutes. On Tuesday June 30, 2020 at 2:26 p.m. I became the Momma of a healthy 8 lbs 5 oz baby boy. His name is Ayden Clement Marta and he's the best thing I've ever done and have ever had in my life. Of course there's always a great story to tell in this adventure I call life, and here is his. I went in for my 38 week doctor's appointment on June 30 at 9 a.m. I wasn't feeling well that morning,...

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Like Getting Hit by a Bull ...

Within a split-second my brain shut down all thoughts running through my head and I heard a little voice inside start to say “We’re going to hit, and hard. It’s going to hurt.” My arms stiffened up and my hands tightened around the steering wheel as the rest of my body pushed itself back against the driver’s seat and my left foot slammed down on the brake pedal. I knew I wasn’t going to stop in time when they hit their brakes out of nowhere and...

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Why I've decided not to Race around the World ...

It's been a bit of a crazy time since August. August was when I was accepted into a missionary organization called The World Race. The plan was to do this mission trip for 11 months in 11 different countries starting August 2018. I was excited when I stumbled on the advertisement on my Facebook feed and even more excited after I applied, interviewed and was accepted to join one of the teams. Then the fun part began. For the next few months...

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What changed this month and what you hope will happen next month (PROMPT 29)

Let's see, the biggest change this month is I've been 29 for almost a month — do I feel any different or more mature, nah. I've been keeping busy with friends and family, which had been a lot of fun. I've been seeing a counselor, which has been interesting and helpful for my mental health. I'm pretty sure I messed up a potential relationship, but I'm not going to beat myself completely over it. I'm pretty sure it wouldn't of worked out in the end anyway. We both were on two different pages on what we wanted. So, yeah another one bites the dust. I...

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PROMPT 28: The month I was happiest this year and why ...

The first month of this year is probably when I was the most happiest. It put an end to a pretty crappy year, and it was a fresh start. Things were looking really good in January. I was happy and I hadn't been that happy in a very long time. I started dating a new guy, that was fun, exciting and I really looked forward to see where that relationship would take me — I felt like I had finally got it right, finally found the one I'd been looking...

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Let Me Tell You 'Bout My Best Friend ... (PROMPT 27: Talk about your siblings)

Damian and I go way back ... well we go back to Sept. 16, 1993 — the day he was born. I was five years old, and I was ecstatic that I was going to have a little brother or at least that's what I have been told by my parents. I do remember asking my parents if we could name him Derek. Why? Well because there was a kid on Barney & Friends (yes, the big purple dinosaur) who I guess I liked. Evidently, my parents went with the name Damian. Damian...

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